freakified

Day after day, countless individuals spend their time on social networking sites, whether they be Facebook, MySpace, or even FaceSpace.  Actually, especially FaceSpace.  That aside, given their addictive nature, there’s evidently quite a bit of money to be made in social networking ventures, particularly from advertising.  This, of course, leads me to the only possible conclusion: I should be getting in on this!  But how can I infiltrate an already saturated market?

Before answering this question, let us examine another internet phenomenon: Nigerian scam emails.  Here’s a heart-wrenching excerpt from one sent to me:

BEFORE I START, I MUST FIRST APOLOGIZE FOR THIS UNSOLICITED MAIL TO YOU, I AM AWARE THAT THIS IS CERTAINLY AN UNCONVENTIONAL APPROACH TO STARTING A RELATIONSHIP, BUT AS TIME GOES ON YOU WILL REALIZE THE NEED FOR MY ACTION.

(…)

PLEASE GIVE ME YOUR CONFIDENTAIL PHONE/FAX NUMBERS SO THAT I CAN FAX TO YOU ALL THE CORRESPONDENCE BETWEEN THE BANK AND ME.

Starting a relationship?  This sounds like social networking material!  But confidential phone and fax numbers?  Surely they don’t belong in a social network!  Or do they?

Welcome to the Numerical Network

Imagine it: you’ve always been searching, waiting, for that someone to come along.  But how can you find them?  Search for similar interests?  Go out and talk to people?  What if you hate talking and have no interests?  Just enter your name, phone number, fax number, social security number, credit card numbers, bank account numbers, and anything else you can think of, and let the computer take over.  You’ll be with that numerically-similar person of your dreams in no time!

The use-cases don’t end there, however.  What if you’re a number theorist who has a list of their favorite numbers, and wants to share it with the world?  Or what if you’re a lonely math student looking for someone who’s favorite number is 7.5?

And there you have it.  The future of social networking.  Coming this summer.